386 – all i want for xmas

December 24th, 2013

386 – all i want for xmas

Erotic garden gnomes are fairly similar to regular ones!

The differences are subtle, and you may miss them at first glance.

Pro tip: erotic gnomes are the ones with their genitals showing.


Discussion (95)¬

  1. Nicksilver says:

    Two world peaces is just too much!
    Also, I didn’t know Fletcher liked Katy Perry.

  2. asmcint says:

    Of course he doesn’t. If he did, he’d have asked for official merchandise. He wants unofficial merchandise to sell on the black market.

  3. Treeoctopus says:

    You know, I think I’ve seen these erotic garden gnomes around, in fact an older lady might have a few laying around.

  4. Rusty says:

    I hope Fletcher gets what he wants, but keep the robot away from me. Merry Christmas Fletcher. Whatever, Copernicus.

  5. Dorien says:

    He only likes her unofficially.

  6. Red_peace says:


  7. Wait? says:

    Wait, so Fletcher understands asimov’s laws, but doesn’t realize Santa lives in the North Pole?

  8. alkathium says:

    Once upon a Christmas, I thought I saw a family of erotic gnomes on my lawn.

    Turned out to be my family.

  9. Antipode says:

    This and the last comic are both #385! The Doctor’s Christmas special today must have even gotten into Antics with his temporal meddling!

  10. Mog says:

    I want to buy a real version of that Christmas sweater more than anything in the whole world ever

  11. Farte (3≈}) Butte says:

    @Mog would you be willing to pay… ALL OF YOUR MONIES???!?!?!! !!?!!

  12. Luio says:

    I just read every single one of the Antics’ comics in the website. I am a proud fan now ^-^ (SO MUCH RANDOMNESS; I SALUTE THEE MASTER OF THE AWESOME AND RANDOM -bows to Fletcher Fletcherson)

  13. Treeoctopus says:


  14. Ivan says:

    I just read that Stephan is dead.

    I really can’t believe it.

    But it happened.

    I wrote “Stephan is dead” on a napkin, read it, and I just told you guys. I think if you print this comic in reverse and also invert the colors, you can hear strange messages from your DVD player when you load it.

    You might not hear “Turn me on dead man… miss him Miss Him MISS HIM!” – but you will hear some crunchy sounds. I think those represent the “Big Mac Aesthetic” despite the disjunctive perturbation of the spatial relationships between the erotic gnome urinating on the headstone.

    It’s hard to decode these artistic deaths. With regard to the issue of death, the sublime beauty of the casket lined with human skin seems very disturbing in light of the inherent
    ultra-specificity (that being, the skin of a Fletcher look-alike).

    But you can’t deny that it visually and conceptually activates the eloquence of these pieces once you see the gnomes behind the headstone in a “69.”

    It may be his greatest work ever – if not in ALL of New Zealand!! (Living down there sure fscks a guy up, ya know?)

  15. Geno says:

    Has he become an Uptown Ghost?

  16. Farte (3≈}) Butte says:

    Stephan answer me WHYYYYYY!!!!!

  17. rickyrick says:

    Oh ivan I thought this was the end and I would have to start murdering rabbits again thank goodness this hopefully isn’t…for the rabbits.

  18. Mantics says:

    Where is the Stephen? Where is the precious? Did the bad hobbit steal the Stephen?

  19. ButterFace says:

    noooo not again! *panics*

  20. Famous Chef says:

    So, is this website dead, then?

  21. Geti says:

    “Welcome to Antics!
    Fletcher is the fellow with a green
    tie, and Copernicus has a red one.
    New comics every Tuesday!”


  22. Famous Chef says:

    “New comics every Tuesday”
    So… No comics means, NO. TUESDAY!
    My world is falling apart.

  23. Geti says:

    At least it was only a weekday, Chef.

  24. Detective Fletcher says:

    I will remember you forever oh glorious Antics comics…Well, i’ll try anyways.

  25. Famous Chef says:

    When you come back to a website, knowing you won’t see a comic, but maybe a disgruntled comment or two, that is when you know a comic has truly died. Goodbye, Antics.

  26. Geti says:

    Chef… My mind…. Are you inside it?!

  27. occasionalmagicuser says:

    I need antics!
    ┻━┻ ︵ヽ(`Д´)ノ︵ ┻━┻

  28. Detective Fletcher says:

    I miss this, but i won’t stop coming here every once and a while to check on it.
    maybe if we all comment enough he’ll come back and have his spunk back?

  29. Ohnoes says:

    I barely made it through the last long antics break. Don’t do this to me again!

  30. Red_Peace says:

    goodbye antics. -manly tear-

  31. Geno says:

    Goodbye, Antics. It’s been fun. Many times have you delayed my schoolwork in favor of yourself but now it’s sadly over. I shall study more now, to graduate. I shall win. I will win this battle.

    For you.

  32. Johnny Goodstuff says:

    Guys, he did say he was getting married… Maybe he’s busy with that.

  33. Muniosi says:

    Please don’t leave us hanging! At least officially announce that it’s over so I can stop worrying :(

  34. Detective Fletcher says:

    I’ve returned to search out and wait for the legendary elusive “Antics comic” it’s been a long time since the last, this is worse then hunting for a needle in the haystack, many times i’ve pondered whether or not I can continue. Throughout the weeks i’ve neglected my gut telling me it’s over, I have to keep the hope up… i’ve started to draw my own fan versions of these chaps…one day hopefully they’ll return.

  35. A Concerned Citizen says:

    It’s now March. Time drags on and yet I still check the site, if not just to see any new comments, but to no avail. The days feel longer. They grow colder. And I can feel the embrace of Antics leaving me.

  36. Detective Fletcher says:

    I’ve lost count of the days, but seeing “A Concerned Citizen” has slightly restored my morale…T’is coming short on the new comic hope but at least people haven’t entirely forgotten…Perhaps, just perhaps there’s some hope left….

  37. Geno says:

    Day 79

    Everyone is panicking. The food supply is starting to run out and everyone is afraid everyone is going to eat each other when the time comes. We’ve been in this camp for so long now, waiting for our lord and savior, Stephen Gillan. When will he arrive? We are on the verge of death. Has our lord abandoned us?

  38. A Concerned Citizen says:

    Maaaaaaaan. There are only so many times I can read the Sky Whales one until I need a new one. C’mon man. You gotta at least update us, if not about the site, about you and what’s going on.

  39. DustyMuffinsss says:

    Hey guys, just got back from the grocer-JESUS WHAT HAPPENED TO EVERYONE?!

  40. Doomsday upon ye says:

    The world is cold without you

  41. A Concerned Citizen says:

    I keep expecting/hoping for the new comment to be from him. It never is.

  42. Detective Fletcher says:

    @A Concerned Citizen
    He may never return it seems, he’s forgotten us all… Sad days.

  43. A Concerned Citizen says:

    I’m starting to think that maybe my ‘present’ is actually the time before these comics were made, but because I think I’m in the future, I’ve actually started reading these backwards and this was the first one. and I’m waiting for it to begin? like, does that make sense?

  44. Detective Fletcher says:


  45. Detective Fletcher says:

    World word world where did the comix go? We’ll never know, but all in all we’ve got these to show. The past memories, many of which were fun, Yet it’s now all come undone. World word world, what is the point? When the comics flew out of detroit. The place one. All and all, this comic was fun. Love you antics.

  46. ButterFace says:

    *piano music* Where’d you go? I miss you so. Seems like it’s been forever, since you’ve been gone. Please come back home. *rapping begins*

  47. A Concerned Citizen says:

    A Concerned Citizen is spitting it on the mic.
    Oh hey look! Another comic! Syke!
    We all be going crazy, waiting, hoping, just maybe.
    Where have you gone man, don’t forget about your baby!
    Fletcher and Copernicus have not been around.
    They haven’t made a noise, not even a sound.
    Are they off on a sky whale or fighting with Jeff?
    Come on man, what’s going on? W. T. F.

  48. Detective Fletcher says:

    A concerned citizen went all out dope.
    Dunno what’s happening but this gives me hope
    That one day, just maybe we’ll get another comic
    sometimes I question this all, other times I just wanna bawl my eyes out
    Hoping that without a doubt he’ll spout out another comic
    words words this is now a rap section.
    just make sure no beheadins’ also read that so it rhymes
    Otherwise I’ll have to take some time to be creative.
    I miss this comic, it is so good
    But for now, I return to my hood.
    wuts good.

  49. Detective Fletcher says:

    Aw man, this comic’s gone awry
    It makes me wanna cry.
    I miss my comics the ones I used to know
    Now all we’ve got is the memories to show
    how good it used to be
    and you see it’s not enough for me
    I want more, I can’t just shut this door
    it’s a part of my life
    this is stabbin’ me with a KNlFE
    C’mon man, give em a hand he made 2 of the greatest comics known to man.
    *Drops mic*

  50. Geno says:

    That was beautiful, you guys.

  51. Detective Fletcher says:

    I only wish that fletcher/copernicus could’ve heard it.

  52. A Concerned Citizen says:

    there should probably be a comic about it if he ever comes back to us.

  53. A Concerned Citizen says:

    Detective Fletcher just laid down some beats.
    Looks like it’s game time and you’re after ‘feats’
    Cause I run this show every day of the week.

  54. A Concerned Citizen says:

    His rhymes are slow and his beat is whack.
    I gotta get him off of my track.
    Putting it all on the table, got no time to be slack.

  55. Detective Fletcher says:

    uh, I’m back and dat was whack
    what you did there, U dun hacked the rhymes
    now you have the nerve to do some crimes.
    you wanna go bro, well yeah I take it slow.
    It’s still d-ope yo. Got them skills dat pay da bills
    So when you come up in here you better open your ears and listen to these rhymes
    or you’ll be doing the time, the time of thinking, tinkering trying to make some lyrics
    but all you can hear is’ My beats and you get on yo feets and run, cause you aint havin’ fun no more. so just drop to da floor and pray for more to come cuz this is hella fun.

  56. Farte (3≈}) Butte says:

    I’ve converted to homestuck. Goodbye fellows.

  57. Detective Fletcher says:

    @Farte (3≈}) Butte, Noooo! Stay! He’ll surely return to us one day! It’s so lonely here…And cold… We must remain hopeful.

  58. Famous Chef says:

    It’s time to let go, Detective. This desire to understand consumes you. You have to let go.

  59. ButterFace says:

    … my light. it’s disappearing… ;n;

  60. Detective Fletcher says:

    it just…why must it end so unresolved. We’ll never get a series finale I guess…..

  61. Batteryhorse says:

    I wonder how long the site will keep running. Should someone create an archive site for this and Uptown Ghost just in case?

  62. Detective Fletcher says:

    I’d say probably… Or make a subreddit for it. or any forum for it, we need this to be memoralized…. If that’s a word….Either way, the show must go on!

  63. Batteryhorse says:

    I don’t think the subreddit format would suit a comic which seems to have ended, as this one has. Maybe an Imgur album?

  64. Detective Fletcher says:

    Yeah, Imgur could work, any permanent (Or as close to it as we can get) to memorialize the site & it’s comics.)

  65. Batteryhorse says:

    I’ve started downloading comics from the beginning forward, but the website’s been going off and on. If someone could start at the present and work backward then we have a higher chance of getting this done before the whole website dies entirely.

  66. Detective Fletcher says:

    But where would someone post said comics? we Need some form of dropzone?

  67. Detective Fletcher says:

    I saved…Every…Single….Comic….What do I do to memorize them now?

  68. Batteryhorse says:

    Alright. I contacted the person who owns the subreddit /r/antics (I’m still planning on hosting with an imgur album but if it just sits there on imgur then a total of nobody is going to find it) and asked for him to hand it over since it hasn’t been used in three years. He hasn’t responded yet but I have a good feeling that he’ll give it to us, since he mentioned on the sidebar that he was willing to give it away. Once we get those together, I’m not sure what to do. Any ideas?

  69. Detective Fletcher says:

    Idk, I have legit all the comics form the site (public ones anyways) saved in a folder… so I guess imgur album, sticky the post on the subreddit and then we remember the site..

  70. Batteryhorse says:

    I got a friend who knows how to computer to rip all the alt texts along with the comics so I’m going to try and put together an imgur album with that. The /r/antics guy hasn’t responded yet, so I’ll let you know how that goes.

  71. Detective Fletcher says:

    Alright man, i shall wait

  72. Batteryhorse says:

    The current owner of /r/antics sent me a message saying he’d be glad to add me as a moderator! So now I have full control of /r/antics and no idea what to do with it.

    Here’s a thought: Why not put up one comic per day, as well as having the full archive available, so that the community remains somewhat active?

  73. Detective Fletcher says:

    I’d say that’s a good idea, but we have to make sure people are aware of the series/subreddit in the first place I guess. now brings up the question, how do we get this into people’s memories?

  74. Detective Fletcher says:

    Bampity tamp, got ep 1 up on the reddit.

  75. Batteryhorse says:

    Would you like me to make you a moderator on the subreddit? If we could communicate on a platform which doesn’t have the chance of mysteriously disappearing at any time, I think we’d be able to get more done.

  76. Batteryhorse says:

    Also we’d both be able to work on the subreddit. So that’s a plus.

  77. Detective Fletcher says:

    Yeah it’d probably be smarter to work on the subreddit of antics since it’s unlikely to vanish away.

  78. Batteryhorse says:

    Copacetic. What’s your Reddit handle?

  79. Detective Fletcher says:

    That’s me, the guy who uploaded 2 comics so far (hit “new” tab on the subreddit)

  80. Batteryhorse says:

    Alright! I don’t know why, but the comics weren’t showing up on the main page. I’ve since fixed that.
    Well, I guess it’s time to bid this website goodbye, at least for now. Here’s hoping all our work is for naught, and Stephen Gillan will come back soon.

  81. Detective Fletcher says:

    And if he does, perhaps he’ll read through all the comics, also yeah dunno why it didn’t show up in the beginning but meh at least it does now.

  82. Batteryhorse says:

    So yeah. If anybody else is still out there, come to reddit.com/r/antics . We’d love your company.

  83. Muniosi says:

    Why do all the great webcomics have to end? :(

  84. Butte Bluffes says:


  85. Geno says:

    Wishlist 2014: New antics comic…or just a message from the creator…anything.

  86. FireSickle says:

    Stephen Gillan

  87. Geno says:

    “Antics isn’t going to carry on forever!”

  88. Red_peace says:

    I miss antics. ;__;

  89. Ayush says:

    i long for the sweet release that is death

    for it is the only escape from this misery

    only the deceased know peace from this suffering that is eternal

  90. Geno says:

    If it takes forever, I will wait for you

    For a thousand summers, I will wait for you

  91. Batteryhorse says:

    Almost a year since Antics last published. Wonder how the server’s still running.

    It’s been a helluva year. We miss you, Antics.

  92. Geno says:

    Where did he go though? Not even the fact that there have been no comics, but no Facebook or Twitter messages either. It’s like he literally disappeared from society out of nowhere.

  93. Red_peace says:

    Maybe he was abducted by the Babylonian man-sheep?

  94. Farte (3≈}) Butte says:

    Guys, I have introduced some people to antics at my school. Here’s hoping the website doesn’t crash for good before they finish, and we will have more to share the misery.

  95. Batteryhorse says:

    @Farte Butte: I don’t think the website’s going down soon; it’s been really stable recently and now that we’ve passed the one year mark since the last update, if someone weren’t paying for the site it would have gone down already.
    And if/when it does go down, I’ve downloaded every comic already and have a subreddit where I’ll start posting comics soon as the website fails.